The phrase “selfish parents” refers to mothers and fathers who prioritize their own emotional and psychological needs over those of their children. Through behaviors like neglect, emotional manipulation, and conditional affection, these parents inflict deep wounds and trauma that can last a lifetime if not addressed.
Research shows that children of selfish or self-involved parents are at higher risk for mental health issues like depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and troubled relationships in adulthood. They often feel unloved, used, and unable to be their true selves around parents who don’t provide them the nurturing all children need.
Quotes from philosophers, authors, and survivors can provide validation and comfort for those struggling with the effects of selfish parents. By giving language and voice to painful experiences, these quotes help make sense of dysfunction and point the way towards resilience and healing.
A warm, happy, and hopeful family should have no boundaries. It should be a festival of unity that fosters respect and faith.
Although many families aspire to such a happy environment, not all of us have been as fortunate. The void is too great for those of us who have experienced selfish parenting.
The mental scars bleed profusely, and the incessant scream for help is deafening.
Here are some quotes about selfish parents to assist you deal with the challenging connection you’ve had. Because the first step to getting over your pain is understanding it.
We all have moments when we question our parents’ decisions, but for the most part, they are acting in our best interests. To teach us what is right and wrong, to encourage and educate us, and to assist us in becoming better people.
However, sometimes those judgments are tainted. Egotistical motives overthrow the instinct to advise and protect. And what was once affection has become reliant.
Seeking approval is punished, and achievements are met with criticism and judgment. It is tiring to resist any success constantly. Dominance, like a dark cloud, looms over happiness.
Your fear of confrontation and denial fuels their power trip. And your accomplishments are used as a source of pride, only to highlight their success before pushing you back into the shadows.
Whether these behaviors began in childhood or later, the mental harm is the same. Internal gaslighting causes you to question everything and can make connections problematic due to trust issues.
These selfish parents’ quotes are meant to give you faith, confidence, and the assurance that you are not lonely. Though your path has been difficult thus far, you can now change sides.
100+Most Selfish Parents Quotes
- “Parents forgive their children least readily for the faults they instilled in them.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach.
- “You don’t have to leave your whole family in the past, just those who don’t deserve a place in your future.” – Christina Enevoldsen
- “You don’t get to choose your family, but you do get to choose how they’re allowed to treat you.” – unknown
- “Parents wonder why the streams are bitter when they have poisoned the fountain.” – John Locke.
- “All of us develop our expectations about how people will treat us based on our relationships with our parents.” – Susan Forward.
- “Some scars don’t hurt. Some scars are numb. Some scars rid you of the capacity to feel anything ever again.” – Joyce Rachelle.
- “Families are homes built on a foundation of trust and love. A toxic family can never be a home, because the foundation doesn’t exist.” – Unknown
- “It is a violation of trust to use your kids as caulking for the cracks in you.” – Anne Lamott.
- “Being a parent shouldn’t be when it is convenient for you. It is a 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year commitment.” – Unknown
- “Fighting became a way of life and seemed perfectly normal for your family.” – Steven Farmer.
- “Family is where you’re meant to be most free. Don’t let blood chain you down.” – Unknown.
- “An unpredictable parent is a fearsome god in the eyes of a child.” – Susan Forward.
- “No, we don’t control who our parents are. We don’t control what color we are. We don’t control what home we are born into. But we control our attitude. We control our work ethic. We control our drive and our commitment.” – Dabo Swinney.
- “It has been my observation that parents kill more dreams than anybody.” – Spike Lee.
- “You may feel guilty for leaving your family behind, but you’ll never regret moving yourself forward.” – Unknown.
- “They are not sorry for harming you. So, don’t feel guilty for cutting them off.” – John Mark Green.
- “Just remember when you are ignoring them, you are teaching them to live without you.” – Unknown.
- “You can always leave your childhood trauma and your abusive mom or dad behind. Never be a victim.” – Unknown
- “To all you parents out there, don’t make your little girls, or little boys, so thirsty for love that they will want to drink water that will poison them.” – Lisa Bedrick
- “Just remember when you are ignoring your child, you are teaching them to live without you.” – Unknown.
- “You shouldn’t do that. Not to your child. You should carry your own burdens.” Cassandra Clare
- “Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.” – Unknown.
- “Did you have parents or just some people who thought they should own somebody?” – Catherine Lacey
- “You have the right to put up a fence between you and your family, and the choice whether to include a gate.” – Unknown.
- “Parents. Honestly. Sometimes they do think the world revolves around them.” – Randa Abdel-Fattah
- “Leave your pride, ego, and narcissism somewhere else. Reactions from those parts of you will reinforce your children’s most primitive fears.” – Henry Cloud.
- “Parent-child relationships aren’t created at birth; they’re created in life.” – Unknown.
- “Parents are the least likely to forgive their children for the flaws they ingrained in them.” – Unknown.
- “You must let go of the responsibility for the painful events of your childhood and put it where it belongs.” – Susan Forward.
- “A dysfunctional family is not a family at all, it’s a toxic relationship parading as a requirement.” – Unknown.
- “If your parents ignored you, or if they are just not emotionally available, or if they yell a lot, that is a type of trauma.” – Tucker Max.
- “Anyone could father a child. But a good parent puts his child’s needs before his own. A parent should be selfless, not selfish.” – Penelope Ward.
- “Family is supposed to be our haven. Very often, it is the place where we find the deepest heartache.” – Iyanla Vanzant.
- “There’s nothing worse than a man who can be everything to everybody else. Except a father to their child.” – Unknown
- “A good parent never uses their child for their happiness.” – Unknown
- “A narcissist parent is easily frustrated by a healthy, independent child that they can’t control through parental emotional manipulation.” – Shannon Thomas
- “Don’t try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do it.” – Russell Baker
- “When you say “No” to a toxic family, you say “Yes” to loving yourself.”
- “A person can’t pick up the children and just squeeze them to which-a-way they want them to be.” – Carson McCullers.
- “Narcissist parents don’t care about their children’s feelings at all. Only their feelings matter.” – Kim Saeed.
- Dysfunctional parents let their children know how burdened they have been by their children and how many sacrifices they had to make to raise them.” – Dr Marita Sirota.
- “Parents are the ones who are least inclined to pardon their kids for the shortcomings they instilled in them.” – Unknown.
- “Being a parent does not give you an excuse for bad manners.” – Rosalind Wiseman.
- “When you’re three or seven years old, it’s less frightening to think of yourself as an unlovable, disappointing screwup than to recognize the fact that you’re living with a monster.” – Keith Ablow.
- “Being a selfish parent is the biggest crime you can do to your child.” – Unknown.
- “They ought to accept you for who you are. Parents ought to adore their children. You’d assume so.” – N. R. Walker.
- “Fear-based parenting is the surest way to create intimidated children.” – Tim Kimmel.
- “You don’t have to leave your whole family in the past, just those who don’t deserve a place in your future.” – Unknown.
- “A true parent prioritizes their children’s needs and wants over their own.” – Unknown.
- “Anyone could father a child. But a good parent puts his child’s needs before his own. A parent should be selfless, not selfish.” — Penelope Ward.
- “Fear-based parenting is the surest way to create intimidated children.” – Tim Kimmel.
- “That man who lives only for himself is the cruelest mortal on the face of the earth.” – Unknown.
- “Anyone can claim to be a “parent” if they have a child. A true parent prioritizes their child’s needs and desires before their own.” – Unknown.
- “A lot of people who have experienced trauma at the hands of people they’ve trusted take responsibility, and that is what’s toxic.” – Hannah Gadsby.
- “The absent are never without fault, nor the present without excuse.” – Benjamin Franklin.
- “Because of the absence of connection and bonding between mother and kid, being surrounded by toxic mothers can be one of the most lonely times in a child’s life.” – Unknown.
- “Selfish parents treat children like a burden rather than a joy. That’s on them and not about you and your worth as a human, so don’t let that drag your self-esteem down.” – Unknown.
- “Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of their negative impact on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.” – Travis Bradberry.
- “At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of parents.” – Jane D. Hull.
- “Good parenting gives headaches, but bad parenting gives heartaches.” – Shiv Khera.
- “Dysfunctional parents do not apologize. It is one feature that the children of narcissists would instantly agree on. They will lie and justify themselves, but never accept they did anything wrong.” – Diana Macey.
- “Instead of treating your child like how you were treated. Treat them with the same love and attention you wanted from your parents while growing up.” – Jonathan Anthony Burkett.
- “As a parent, you should be more concerned with your child’s happiness than your petty insecurities and jealousies. Just a thought!” – Unknown
- “Follow your own passion – not your parents’, not your teachers’ – yours.” – Robert Ballard.
- “It is the selfish parents who are to blame. Pay attention, and be involved in your children’s lives. They are your legacy, your only hope.” — Aaron B. Powell
- “Your mother’s happiness is not your responsibility. It has never been.” – Unknown.
- “Selfish people are unable to love others, but they are also unable to love themselves.” – Unknown.
- “They should love you, just as you are. Parents should love their kids, right?” “You’d think so.” ― N.R. Walker
- “Sometimes, the people closest to you betray you, and your home isn’t a place you can be happy anymore. It’s hard but it’s true.” – P.C. Cast
- “The selfishness of the parents is to blame. Pay attention to your kids’ lives and get involved. Your only hope and your legacy are them.” – Aaron B. Powell.
- “If a mother cannot sacrifice for her kids, she doesn’t deserve them!” – Unknown.
- “Toxic mothers are image-oriented rather than love-oriented.” – Sherrie Campbell.
- “Today’s troubled homes are made by parents who want to have children but don’t want their children to have parents.” – Agona Apel.
- “As a parent, your child’s happiness should come before your own petty anxieties and jealousies.” – Unknown.
- “You don’t let go of a bad relationship because you stop caring about them. You let go because you start caring about yourself.” – Charles Orlando.
- “Children shouldn’t have to sacrifice so that you can have the life you want. You make sacrifices so your children can have the life that they deserve.” – Unknown.
- “Being a selfish parent is a sign of not having learned from experience.” – Unknown
- “Selfishness is not living as one wishes, but rather requesting that others live as one wishes.”
- “Narcissistic parents don’t really recognize their children as people separate from them. Instead, they see their children as little extensions of themselves. The needs of the child are defined by the needs of the parent, and the child who tries to express his needs is often accused of being selfish or inconsiderate.” — Jonice Webb
- “Any mother that could be cruel to a child is not going to apologize to that child when they have grown up.” – Rayne Wolf
- “Anyone can have a child and call themselves a parent. A real parent is someone who puts that child above their own selfish needs and wants.” – Unknown
- “An unloving mother robs the child of a sense of belonging. The need to belong can become a lifelong quest for him or her.” – Peg Streep
- “There’s no point in having children if you’re not going to be home enough to father them.” – Anthony Edwards
- “Selfish parents may someday realize what damage they have done that can never be undone.” – Unknown
- “The hateful and stinging words of a narcissistic parent can linger in the mind of an adult child long after the adult has left home.” – Shannon Thomas
- “Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being.” – Kittie Frantz
- “My dad had limitations. That’s what my good-hearted mom always told us. He had limitations, but he meant no harm. It was kind of her to say, but he did do harm.” – Gillian Flynn
- “Give more time and thought to your child’s happiness than your petty insecurities and jealousies to make life for your whole family a much more joyful experience.” – Unknown
- “No man should bring children into the world who is unwilling to persevere to the end in their nature and education.” – Plato
- “What’s so sad is when we’re younger, if you have a bad parent, that is normal to you, and that’s what you think of as healthy.” – Jennifer Lawrence
- “The toxic parent sees the child as a threat to their own ego and having the child overshadow the parent is not an option in their mind.” – Shannon Thomas
- “As a parent, you should be more concerned with your child’s happiness than your petty insecurities and jealousies.” – Unknown
- “Anyone can have a child and call themselves ‘a parent.’ A real parent is someone who puts that child above their own selfish needs and wants.” – Unknown
- “Being a selfish parent is a sign of not having learned from experience.” – Anon
- “My parents loved us, but I wasn’t always sure they liked us.” – Tahereh Mafi
- “Children shouldn’t have to sacrifice so that you can have the life you want. You make sacrifices so your children can have the life that they deserve.” – Unknown
- “Parents forgive their children least readily for the faults they themselves instilled in them.” – Unknown
- “Being a parent shouldn’t be when it is convenient for you. It is a 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year commitment.” – Unknown
- “They are not sorry for harming you. So, don’t feel guilty for cutting them off.” – John Mark Green
- “If you teach hatred to your children, one day your child will have that hatred reflected back onto them and onto YOU.” – Suzy Kassem
Frequently Ask Questions
Q1: What Are Some Common Behaviors of Selfish Parents?
A: Some common selfish parental behaviors include emotional neglect, conditional affection based on a child’s performance, verbal abuse, manipulation, prioritizing their own needs over the child’s needs, failure to nurture and support self-esteem.
Q2: What Kind of Emotional Damage Can Selfish Parents Inflict?
A: The emotional damage selfish parents inflict can be severe and long-lasting, including issues like chronic low self-esteem, anger problems, anxiety, depression, difficulty maintaining healthy relationships, substance abuse, eating disorders, and suicide risk.
Q3: How Can Quotes Help Children of Selfish Parents?
A: Quotes can validate children of selfish parents’ painful experiences, help them realize they aren’t alone in struggling with these issues, provide perspective, and inspire strength, resilience and healing. Seeing their feelings mirrored in the words of wise thinkers can encourage self-forgiveness and moving forward.
Q4: is It Healthy to Cut Off Contact With Selfish Parents?
A: Sometimes, for self-protection and emotional well-being, it is necessary for adults who grew up with selfish parents to greatly limit or even completely sever contact. This allows them to take back power these parents exploited and work on healing without continuing toxicity.
Q5: How Can Therapy Help With Healing From Selfish Parents?
A: Therapy provides immense value in recovering from the wounds selfish parents inflict. It offers guidance in rebuilding self-esteem, establishing healthy boundaries, processing anger and grief, correcting warped belief systems, overcoming destructive habitual patterns, and achieving self-actualization despite a painful childhood.
Q6: Will I Repeat the Same Dysfunctional Parenting Behaviors With My Own Children?
A: Breaking negative cycles of selfish parenting within families is difficult but possible. With dedication to personal growth work, consciously nurturing empathy and emotional needs, surrounding yourself with healthy relationships, and committing to be the parent you needed as a child, the pattern can end with you.
Conclusion
Living in the shadow of a self-centered parent can be a lonely and vulnerable place. Numerous issues will be raised as a result of the lack of love and respect. And there’ll be no replies for some.
However that doesn’t mean you can’t get on with your life and enjoy it.
Use these selfish parents quotes to take comfort in the midst of the chaos. And learn to accept yourself for who you are becoming.
I have been writing articles from the very beginning. I research before writing tutorials and make sure to pen it down in such a way that it becomes easier to understand by users.